# Friendship # Belonging

How the wisdom coding system works

**WISDOM CLASSIFICATION SYSTEM Type of wisdom** (purple box) **E** = Evolutionary wisdom **R** = Revealed wisdom **H** = Hybrid wisdom (evolutionary + revealed mix) --- **Target audience** (green box) **P** = Personal **G** = Group (non-personal) --- **Type of content** (yellow box) **C** = Curated content (paraphrased, re-written, enhanced, translated, etc.) **O** = Original unedited content from external source (direct excerpts, complete content, etc.) **M** = Mix of both curated and original content. --- **Reliability factor of content** (blue box) **1** = High **2** = Average **3** = Low **X** = Cannot be determined. --- **APPLICABLE JURISDICTION(S)** \[ \] soil \[ \] Land \[ \] Sea \[ \] AIR - Check boxes indicate to which planetary jurisdiction the contents of the page is applicable. - Can apply to one or more jurisdictions simultaneously. - All the applicable jurisdictions will have a check mark. - For additional information about the scope of these jurisdictions please refer to this [chart](https://tbg.pikapod.net/books/the-rules/page/light-and-life-categories-by-planetary-jurisdictions "Light and Life categories by planetary jurisdictions"). - For additional information about the properties of these jurisdictions please refer to this [chart](https://tbg.pikapod.net/books/the-rules/page/4-jurisdictions-flow-matrix "4 Jurisdictions Flow Matrix"). --- **SOURCE:** This row is used for recording useful information about the source of the wisdom entry.

Mankind is one big family

**CLASSIFICATION**
R	P	M	1

**JURISDICTION**
- [x] soil	- [x] Land	- [x] Sea	- [x] AIR

**SOURCE:** tmtranscripts teamcircuits email archive March 29, 1998. Teacher Elyon T/R Jonathan

There is great significance, in the truth that we are all one family of mankind. I would address you on the notion of belonging. It is difficult during times of challenge to feel the sense of fraternity when it is perceived by your senses that you are estranged from others, for you are grappling with personal lessons which appear unmanifested in the actions of others. This is an important time for you to pursue the inner belonging with the Father, that purr of perfection within. It is also important to pursue counsel, feedback from your fellows, to eliminate isolation; that solitary trek through your difficulties is unnecessary. Lessons are learned only by yourself. However, the many helpers about you are always ready to provide guidance, and even when guidance is not available, support is. Let us realize that belonging can be considered as the two words "be" and "long". You will for eternity be part of the family; never will it just cease to be the case. True, the young children of our Father are often struggling with the sense of singular existence, struggling with what seems to be odds in the world about them. This is only evident on worlds who have lost the guidance that planets unlike yours have. In cases such as the conditions found on Earth, we stress to you the importance of becoming the initiator of the understanding and the experiential demonstration that you belong to a universe of friends and fellows who are all part of the Father's family.

# Coincidence

How the wisdom coding system works

Coincidences happen on a grid

**CLASSIFICATION**
R	G	O	1

**JURISDICTION**
- [x] soil	- [x] Land	- [ ] Sea	- [ ] AIR

**SOURCE:** tmtranscripts Lightline Teleconference 2024-09-19 Teacher Amanson

Amanson: Let us speak tonight on coincidence, those meetings in time that seem uncannily planned, because, for the most part, they are. “Planned by whom?” you ask. Ah, “There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, than are dreamt of in your philosophy.” Now, young Hamlet said these words 400 years ago and they are still fresh, as if new minted today. Coincidence, or as you tend to spell it ‘co-incidents’, happen on a grid. They are shuffled in the simplest yet complex fashion behind the scenes (‘beyond the veil’ to you). And life is structured on a need-to-know basis! The truth is what appears as coincidence – a chance meeting; the appropriate word overheard; the confluence of stars; schedules that are somehow magically made to mesh – is the result of vibrational pull, and of necessity a way is cleared in the lives of the persons (i.e. frequencies) creating those vibrations. When one is aligned with a purer vibration, a vibration bereft of fear, worry, the concerns that disrupt the connection to the central switchboard (I use a very human image), your calls can get through, so to speak; an even flow is established and happy co-incidents result. But when the wires get crossed, static invades the frequency and one’s vibration is altered, made irregular, volatile, anything but ‘free-flowing’.\* Then, although ‘coincidence’ can happen, it is the result of a different program, an actual moment of chance, random, which is very low percentage in your world; far, far more meetings are the result of Truth in action, the Oneness displaying itself in mufti, unity in variety. I hear your question about the statement “Every encounter is by divine appointment.” Yes, but is every encounter a “coincidence”? No. Here we are talking about those surprising examples of “What are the odds?!”; “How in the world…!”; “Who would have thought?!” There is much – and more! — that goes on behind the scenes than you could possibly know, but to turn yourself to this reckoning through Faith, through the quiet activity of aligning yourself with, if not a whole-hearted belief in such a phenomenon (let alone a knowledge) then at least to the possibility of it, is a step in the right direction. Let its actuality seep slowly at first into your mind through your imagination, then let that gradual acquaintance become the foundation for a genuine introduction into the higher vibrational world of the co-incident, a world where the divine escorts the human along the path of interior relationships, resulting in the peace of mind becoming a citizen of so high and clear a vision of the inner workings of the world. For truly, "There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, than are dreamt of in your philosophy."

\* When I asked Amanson how these vibrations get so distorted, he said, “Man buries himself under his own angst”

# Companionship

How the wisdom coding system works

To be a companion is to simply be present with another person

**CLASSIFICATION**
R	G	M	1

**JURISDICTION**
- [x] soil	- [x] Land	- [ ] Sea	- [ ] AIR

**SOURCE:** tmtranscripts teamcircuits email archive March 24, 2000. Teacher Ambrosia T/R Bill

Ambrosia: As you grow in spiritual understanding and in unselfish devotion to serving one another and all others whom you encounter, you are increasing in the quality and practice of love. Personality interaction is the most fundamental satisfaction of existence, both mortal, for the soul, and spiritual. In your personality status you are most closely aligned with the image of God, for this is how God has created all of us according to the perfect pattern of personality manifest in the Eternal Son. You are learning to be companionate with each other, to express the pleasure of simply being in the presence and interacting with another person with no ulterior motives or manipulative devices. To be a companion is to simply be present with another person. It does not involve the obligation of teaching. It does not require salesmanship on your part. It does not require obligatory service either. True, companionship is not the sum total of interpersonal relationships but it is one very lovely aspect which is lacking in the hubbub of your materialistic, rushing to judgement, preoccupied state of affairs. In some ways simpler cultures have more wisdom for they have placed more value in being companions to each other. It is this lack which damages families and which is so sorely needed between parents and children and between siblings as well; and also between the original couple, husband and wife. You see, in eternity's view it is these kinds of relationships which have such lasting value. Yes, work is important and teamwork and groupings to accomplish objectives are yet a very important part of interpersonal relations. But the flavor of a group is so greatly enhanced by the element, by the substance of the companionship provided therein. Your companionship with the First Source and Center through your Thought Controller is your most intimate experience and someday you will achieve perfect completion of that companionship in fusion experience. You will be the vehicle of personality for your Thought Controller and your Thought Controller will give you the dimension of eternity. Together you will fuse and become one even as our Creator Son in his divinity is one with his humanity. Great and wonderful are the purposes of God in His decision to create time and space. Those of us who are of finite status continually learn new and greater understanding of the great heart of love which beats the pulse of the universe. There is a distinction to be made about companionability and teamwork as representing two different kinds of interrelationships. Many people choose their life partners on the basis of compatibility of interests and just "doing" things together. Certainly, this is not to be faulted, for there is an inherent value in this kind of interrelationship. My observations are that men in particular define their essence in terms of their activities, although this is modifying somewhat lately, still males in particular think of themselves as teachers, construction workers, golfers, fishermen, fathers, these sorts of activities define many men in their own minds. Similarly do women define their essence, although they see themselves more in the role of nurturance than production. But even the role of parents can be primarily a "doing" rather than "being" role, in many cultures. Being in the same space but not interacting in sharing is not companionability. To be companionate in the sense that I was describing, means to be comfortable, relaxed, attentive, and interested in the other person, in their thoughts, in their feelings, and in their values. So companionship entails sharing ideas, certainly involves sharing values, and it also recognizes the domain of feelings as well. This sharing, in order to be companionate, needs to be non-judgmental. It needs to be non-competitive. It needs to proceed from the inherent value assigned to that other person, the value of a faith son or daughter of God and therefore, a brother or sister. You see, even more fundamental in a marriage relationship than husband and wife, than lover, than co-parent, is the level of brother/sister, as children of one Parent. This ultimate, fundamental level gives final value to the person and to oneself so that these other levels of interaction are properly honored and appropriately framed. Nancy: Is silence, when someone is distracted, is this the opposite of companionable? Ambrosia: That is true; for the silence indicates absence of presence. Virginia: Is that always true? Ambrosia: In someone who is distracted, yes. Now, silence may be a very comfortable thing. It can signal that there is no need to perform, to gain approval from the other person. It can take and enshroud a beautiful experience with a sort of holiness when both people are engaged in meditation as they view the panorama of some beautiful scene such as the grand canyon. It is only in the silence of a production orientated association with another person that embarrassment and discomfort develops, for then each person feels they are not doing their part in maintaining the conversation. Lori: I find that now, with limited time because of ever increasing responsibilities, that I kind of grasp little moments of companionship with my friends, family, and children. Now I am questioning if it is one sided....and that's okay if it is for me, cause I get a great deal of joy from it, being even with my husband, children, or friends even when they are busy; I'm just there soaking it up and feeling completely like a companion, offering to help or not, but still feeling some companionship, hanging out in their space while they zoom all around...whether it is in strict definition of what you, Ambrosia, were trying to convey..I don't know. For me, it does feel like true companionship, and a real break for me. Ambrosia: Yes, I would agree that this is exactly what companionship is. It may be that their zooming around as you say, and occupying the same space with somebody does not mean you are not being a companion, for you are. When I made a distinction between the interactions that occur in teamwork, I was, in fact, not thinking of what you are describing, but more the actual working setting of most people. I have experience at being a tour guide and it is a very profoundly satisfying form of companionship. I imagine that at times you may feel somewhat like a tour guide with your children, as you go here and there with them; for parents show their children the world every day. They are with them and point out things that are of interest to them and hope will be of interest to their children. Lori: It's hard in this day and age to even have time to just hang out with someone in just a companionship relationship. I guess that's why I feel like I seize little moments here and there even if the person I am with isn't in that same companionizing mode. That's what I meant. It may be unilateral, but it still works for me. Ambrosia: Yes, understood. It is, of course, more ideal if the two people are in the companionate mode and it is not unilateral, but mutual. In fact, if there is anything I would offer to you all as a suggestion it would be to prioritize your time in such a way that you place boundaries around companionate time with your spouses, with your children and with your friends. You term it, "quality time", and this is very accurate. It is essential for the well being of families that these companionate relationships be strengthened, enhanced, and prioritized as the most import time you spend, rather than just another nice thing that you could choose to do from among many other options. Marty: Does the physical person have to be there or can it be somehow accomplished on this planet via the phone, or whatever, when family or friends are out of personal communication? Ambrosia: The answer is, of course, yes, Marty. The thing that is obvious, however, is that there really is no substitute for the physical presence. The other communication modes are greatly reduced in effectiveness inasmuch as scientists estimate that communication occurs somewhere in the range of 75 to 90% by nonverbal means. When you cannot see the person, but have to rely only on hearing, you lose some of that nonverbal information. But, most important is your intention; and indeed, consider how much better it is for your generation than it was for people hundreds of years ago who relied on written communication which took weeks to reach the recipient. Nancy: It seems to me that a lot of nonverbal communication isn't just visual but it's sharing energy, it's changing the energy mood and I can't do that over the phone. It's also why I can't imagine teaching by video or learning by video, but especially teaching, not being able to feel the energy of students shift. Ambrosia: I agree. There is no substitute for the literal presence for the reasons you just expressed. I can not adequately explain to you what circuitry involves. When you say energy exchange that is part of what we call circuitry. It is on a mindal level, both cognitive and feeling. It is also on a soul level of connection. Of course, as long as you are mortals it is important to include touch, the physical connection as well.

There is a deep companionship that goes beyond just friendship

**CLASSIFICATION**
R	G	M	1

**JURISDICTION**
- [x] soil	- [x] Land	- [ ] Sea	- [ ] AIR

**SOURCE:** tmtranscripts teamcircuits email archive April 18, 2002. Teacher Welmek

Welmek: It is through companionship that you grow with your brethren, that you are deepening the connection above of friendship with them that fills your life with a sense of purpose and connectivity that is so important to your growing personality development. You know full well that you are social creatures, do you not? And as social creatures you must be in relationship with other people to fulfill these needs. However, of the relationships that you are in; how many could you truly say are deeply satisfying and immensely rewarding from the standpoint that you can share you innermost self with these individuals and feel that they can share their selves with you in an environment of unconditional respect, affection and to an extent, understanding? Would you say that the majority of your relationships fall into this category? Student 1: Welmek, for me, I enjoy, I mean truly enjoy this, for me is my real wealth. This above all I am proud of and happy about, is the people I have known. My sister since I was born. Tim and Shirley since I was in college forty-some years. Two ladies for almost thirty years, a recent friend, a dancing partner for two and a half to three years. Some other male friends over twenty years. And I can say in most of these cases that it is still, this friendship is still growing. And then, also happy to have about fifty-some people I relate to in terms of, you might say business and things. So I feel my life is wonderfully full that way. Welmek: Yes, it is indeed one of life's joys to have a circle of people around you who know you and love you. But I am now speaking of the most intimate and loving of relationships, that deep companionship that is of a nature that goes beyond just the friendship; it is as if you are soul-buddies. Would you say that you have relationships of that nature? Student 1: Very much so! My friends, Tim and Shirley, these transcend time and space. We are together. Two ladies; one I was married to for awhile and just in the last three or four years has made so much, such enormous spiritual, soul growth, just in deciding to live, coming out of drug addiction and absolute, absolute devastation; physical and mental and spiritual devastation. And being a friend to this person and giving this person someone to relate to so she wouldn't be institutionalized or dead and seeing her grow and being absolutely thrilled, loving her in spite of the wreck she is, to see this courage to come awake and continue to live. Another lady I was with for ten years; we are still absolutely together, even though there was an enormous kind of rejection because we didn't get back together as lovers and that but stayed really true friends. Welmek, I don't know any boundaries on these relationships. Welmek: And what do you say that, in these relationships, you find it easy to be in that state of self-forgetfulness and just sharing who you are, the beauty of your personality, the joy of being together and the pleasure that you have in discovering who these people are? Student 1: Welmek, you know, to me the signature of these friendships is that it's a mystery. I really don't know why I am happy just to see them or to hear from them, but I am, it's a spontaneous thing and it's something inexplicable and just, just so joyful for that very reason. Welmek: There is a deep level of exploration that comes in knowing another person. It is as if you are discovering aspects of the Father Himself. And I say to you that there is joy, there is adventure, there is exhilaration and immense freedom as you learn who another person is in your life and how you can continue to unfold in your personality sharing together that leads you to new associations and deeper communal expressions of the Fathers' love within your bonded and unified relationship. Student 1: Welmek, I thank you for this insight because I do not naturally think of this as coming from a personality, in other words, the Father's nature. And I enjoy that perspective, I like the feel of it. It's just to me still a bit beyond my comprehension that this comes as a source; to me it's something surrounding me, it's part of me, so I don't see it as other. And in that I'm probably not entirely mistaken but to see it as a source, outside of myself, is a new perspective. Welmek: It is a source outside of you and it is a source inside of you. It is both. And it is difficult at your level to extricate that which is external and that which is internal. And I would even say that it is not even necessary to know that which is outside and that which is within. The important concept is to understand that the nature of companionships is important to your spiritual development and also to help you understand a deeper level of why these companionship relationships are important than you have perhaps considered before. The idea of growing these friendships and adding to the companionship quotient in your life is so important because in the actual bond that you share with another person, you find a level of love and peace and togetherness and this is all a part and parcel of who the Father is and how the universe is glued together with these relationships and how nothing can exist without these relationships. And what you are doing my friend is, you are adding a level of enjoyment and experience into the evolving Supreme Being, that is God experiencing life through you. Student 1: This is where I agree that it's not important to make a certain distinction of other and self, because in one way there is a profound oneness, a union as the absolute reality; we in our little beginning stage here, even participate in. One of the most wonderful things that stuck with me and found resonance in my living mind of the words in the Urantia Book is when it pointed out most physical things, even things like, living things, like food and shelter, in a way they are a means to an end, but our relationships, our companionships with other persons are an end in themselves. In that sense they are outside of time, they do not exist so that we can get something in the future; they are now. I was really thrilled with that insight from the text. Welmek: They are part and parcel of the Father. They are the expression of the Father in each of you as you move and grow and experience your relationship. They are eternal; they are existential, and you my friend have the exquisite joy of sharing in this most wonderful and blessed of all experiences; to have companionship with another individual that will lead you to deeper levels of understanding the Father. There is so much beauty and grandeur in these relationships. The more you amass your friendships at this deeper spiritual level, the more joy and love you will experience and the more you will forget about what it is that you need and what it is that you expect in life and find that your true joy comes just in being with good friends and sharing the love of the Father that is growing and bonding you together. Student 2: This is a difficult one for me in the sense of; I really don't have any true friends that I could call my soul buddies. Although I am experiencing the opening or the promising of a companionship with a woman at this time and we do talk to each other about our spiritual life and what's going on in our lives. And there is love between us, and so that is promising and has potential to be quite rewarding and rich. I do have people who I confide in about what's going on in my life, the innermost parts of my life. But maybe it's part of my personality or makeup that I've never really had a true friend during my childhood, as we traveled around a lot, and we moved every two years, so I was never really established any deep long-lasting friendships. And I've always envied people who stayed in one place and had a best friend for life. So I've always been kind of a solitary person and I don't feel lonely, although there are times where I do feel alone for romantic purposes. But my children are my friends as well. I don't necessarily confide every single thing to them, as they don't with me, but I consider them my soul mates as well; and there is a lot of love between us, obviously. But one of my regrets is like with my mother, I could never confide in her my deepest innermost secrets. And there's always that barrier between us, that I can't be totally myself. So I don't have that whole network of friendship, of soul mates, but I'm more of a solitary person. Welmek: Would you say that in the relationships that you have do you find that your soul is at rest when you are with these individuals? Student 2: I would say yes. Like I am creating a community with the church that I'm participating in and my soul's at rest with D. and E. and this woman that I am seeing, and her children. But I am experiencing great unrest with the person that's living with me, and it's causing me great discomfort. Welmek: There are two elements I would like to address here. One is the idea of being a companion to someone and this level of relationship usually is one of reciprocity where neither individual feels that it is necessary to offer advice or guidance or support. It is a level of enjoyment and I would even call it service of just sharing who you are and letting the other person express himself or herself to you and allowing the union of your souls to blend together and fill you with peace and satisfaction. There is a delightful self-forgetfulness that occurs in this relationship for do you not find that the time passes quickly, and that you feel uplifted, and that it is an enjoyable experience that when you leave the encounter you feel good and it was something that you look forward to experiencing again and again. This is one level that I am suggesting. If you do experience this then, this level of companionship that I am suggesting is what is so satisfying in human experience. There are those relationships that are more, I would say, service oriented where you are forgetting yourself and putting the needs of another person in front of yours. This is best epitomized in the parent-child relationship and you know full well what that entails from your relationship with your children. But in this relationship of the person that is now living with you, I would ask you to consider what kind of relationship do you think this will be for you, one of a companionship nature, or one of a service nature -— of parent-child. Do you have any confusion in your mind about this, or are you perhaps being torn in two different directions in your own mind? Student 2: I know I'm being torn. I know I don't feel joy, I've even felt betrayed by some of his actions or words he has said. Welmek: Is it because you are looking for a certain level of understanding from him in yourself? Student 2: Possibly Welmek: And if this is so, then I suggest that you take a closer look at this individual and ask for insight into this person's motivations and behavior, for it could be that you are mixing to a certain extent what it is that this relationship is about. He is very emotionally young, is he not? Student 2: Yes, very much so. Welmek: And so in that youthfulness you can see that there is more of the child in him, and as a person who is more emotionally stable and mature this would lend itself to the parent-child relationship inasmuch as you do not expect that child to understand you, but you provide guidance and assistance to that person so they can learn a better way, they can learn some of the boundaries that are necessary in interpersonal relationships that will give them a better sense of self-discipline and respect for others. Student 2: What happens if he's not open to doing that? Welmek: But it is not a matter of you portraying this in an overt fashion. It is a subtle and I would say, inspired approach on your part by going to Jesus and saying, "Jesus, this person is now in my home, and it is to some extent my responsibility to care for this individual. Teach me the ways of being a good parent-friend to this person that will not make him feel threatened or insignificant but will teach him those skills that he now needs to live life more independently and successfully on his own." And perhaps in time, when he grows and develops more, you will have forged a deeper level of relationship that affords you this level of companionship/reciprocity that we were discussing. You must also recognize that it is not your responsibility to change this person. Although this person is in your home and you are trying to offer guidance; you must also remember that this person has his own unique way of looking at things that will not match yours at many times. As a boarder in your home, you have every right to expect him to consider your standards, but you must also remember that he is coming from a certain place of, I will say, a lack of discipline, and he does not at this time understand or honor your ways to the extent that he will come to understand in the future. You must be patient and consistent and most of all, non-judgmental and he will respond to that. I would encourage you to extend this idea of spiritual buddy to a larger community and to find those individuals with whom you can share the beauty and integrity of yourself with. There is no need to hold back who you are. You are a beautiful person and have many gifts to share. It is the romantic ideal to have this one individual that you can share yourself with and I am not discounting that, but I am also encouraging you to be more forthcoming with who you are with other people now in your sphere. Let them see the beauty. Let them see what you have to give. et them come to know you and in that knowing of who you are they will love you and return love to you. You must make the first step and let them see you. There is nothing to hide; you have much beauty and love to give. Let them see that and they will respond accordingly. That is the joy of being in companionship with people. As you exude your love, your beauty, your personality that comes from the Father — everything in you that is good, and true, and real — how can other people not love you and want to know you more? And so you can never have too many friends, and you will find that your relationships grow and deepen. The more you give of yourself, the more you will find these deeper levels of companionship. And this is why self-forgetfulness is so important to this growing level of companionship, because the more you show who you are, the more you forget about your worries and your cares. And are not these all encumbrances of the ego-self? The universe is rich in companionship; and as you grow and feel this family of brothers and sisters about you now, you will find the blessings within your soul fill you to such exquisite depths and breaths and heights that the only true expression of your heart will be one of worshipful gratitude to the Father for making this all possible and real in your life.

# Conflict

How the wisdom coding system works

There can be no real growth without conflict

**CLASSIFICATION**
R	G	M	1

**JURISDICTION**
- [x] soil	- [x] Land	- [ ] Sea	- [ ] AIR

**SOURCE:** tmtranscripts teamcircuits email archive Nov. 20, 1998. Teacher Daniel T/R Bill

My dear siblings, if you could feel the joy and love that we your older siblings experience as we intermingle with you, you would have some small consciousness of the grandeur of a cosmic family of the brotherhood/sisterhood/personhood of all freewill universe intelligences. You see, you have struggled valiantly to retain your cohesion as a functional family unit and you have succeeded excellently. In this struggle you have heard many viewpoints divergent from your own. You have seen sides of each other you never even imagined were possible. You have discovered aspects of yourselves in deep recesses and dark corners which you knew not before. And in so doing has your universe of reality expanded to embrace the diversity of each other and yourselves as well. You have tasted a small portion of the larger reality of the true cosmic unity in diversity of God the Supreme. Just a small taste of the flavor of the whole. And yet has this sampling been so grievous and difficult that you would withdraw from the table of our Creator Parents and leave the banquet feast of fellowship with your brothers and sisters? No, none of you would. In fact, you have all experienced an expansion of your own souls. It is not the purpose of conflict to divide and destroy. Referring to conflict that is the result of growth expansion. Your experience of conflict has been of this nature rather than of destructive and unspiritual dimensions. You see, we live in an incomplete and imperfect creation which is evolving and developing towards the final goal of perfected status. That is why we know that without conflict and struggle, without insecurity and unsurety there can be no real growth, but rather the opposite, soul stagnation, which, if it continues long enough may result in spiritual death. And so, on the one hand I say to you welcome to the real world, where conflict results in growth. And congratulations on letting your experience of love surmount all obstacles and difficulties. You came upon a large boulder on the path. You wished to move around it, but it blocked your way. You had to find a hand hold and a foot hold and scale it and come down the other side to complete your experiential triumph. As I have taught you in the past, every accomplishment results in a brief period of rest and rejuvenation, but only for a short while until the next task commands your attention. When I first began teaching you seven long years ago, I told you that we were about change - that the essence of my teaching would be to dig around the roots to fertilize and to water so that you might grow up to be strong oaks bearing many branches, able to hold your living system of branches and leaves, trunk and root, a whole ecology of life. And indeed have our efforts together been successful.

The metaphor of ice as problems, troubles, conflicts, and obstacles

**CLASSIFICATION**
R	G	M	1

**JURISDICTION**
- [x] soil	- [x] Land	- [ ] Sea	- [ ] AIR

**SOURCE:** tmtranscripts teamcircuits email archive April 25, 1999. Teacher Elyon T/R Jonathan

I will address the topics of problems, troubles, conflicts, and obstacles as well as spiritual connectedness. I will use the metaphor of ice. Ice can be seen as any one of these troubles or conflicts in your life that you wish to melt. When the environment is right, when the conditions exist that can warm, that can bring solution, then your problems or your obstacles will begin to dissolve. This is like your conventional oven where the solution is applied from external conditions. You can as well use an internal technique not unlike your microwave ovens where you warm the ice from the inside out using the spiritual circuitry of the Father, the Son, and our Mother Spirit. It may be said that this is the method of exchanging your mind for the mind of Christ, for in the circuitry of the Father and the Son and the Spirit we discover love and mercy and compassionate service. These are qualities that reside within you even now. Love need not be sought; it only need be expressed, and therein you will discover your possession. To be connected to the spirit forces and personalities of divinity, think of yourself as in their microwave field. They will warm you all over, every place at one time, but it is well and good to fellowship with your brothers and sisters to let love and compassion warm you from the outside in. Both sources of heat will melt the ice. Again, this illustrates the value of the coupling of the Fatherhood of God with the brotherhood of man, the realization of the personality and presence of God and the many personalities that minister to you from all areas of life. If you find that a conflict of which you seek resolution persists because the time appears not right to resolve it, it may be that the conventional oven is not on. You can apply the other approach, the spiritual microwave, and work on that micro-level where those little factors that compose the problem each becomes heated, that is, thawed such that the greater macro-difficulty you perceive will begin to resolve itself. It may be that the situation involving numerous individuals and their relationships is the difficulty, and you are one of the molecules. By becoming warmed yourself, you are as an element in the internal makeup of the problem contributing to the warmth and the thaw. Other times you are not an integral part of the problem, per se, and you act as a conventional heating coil and must warm the difficulty away from the outside. This form of ministry is often involved when you have already traversed the path of resolution of a conflict of a similar nature that another one is undertaking. It is growth that has gone by rather than growth you are now experiencing concomitantly with another. Hopefully this will bring insights for you when encountering obstacles in your life or when ministering to others who are dealing with their obstacles. Refresh yourselves, to be invigorated such that you will be feeling more powerful when you do meet with the challenges that help you grow and the challenges that help you serve.

# Fellowship

How the wisdom coding system works

What is fellowship?

**CLASSIFICATION**
R	G	M	1

**JURISDICTION**
- [x] soil	- [x] Land	- [x] Sea	- [x] AIR

**SOURCE:** tmtranscripts teamcircuits email archive April 5, 1998. Teacher Ham

Ham: What is fellowship? What does it mean to share oneself and to receive the sharing of another? There are times when your sharing is obvious to you and there are times when sharing is almost unconscious. As you grow in the spirit, you learn to balance this sharing consciously more and more. In interaction there is often one party that shares the most, talks the most, wants the other party to see him and admire him. And, the other party is often more retiring and shares less. You of the spirit must recognize which tendency you have, either to share too much or too little, and start thinking about balance. Being interested in other people and willing to listen to their sharing is very important. Jesus always listened first before he talked. Then when he knew something about the person, he taught by asking questions and letting that person discover answers for themselves. Many of you have never tried this technique of communication and it would help you to do so. Others speak too little and are so retiring that it is embarrassing for you to bring yourself to the front and speak in a balanced manner with others. You are all just beginners at the art of relationships and as you grow in the spirit, you will be more and more skilled at bringing forward the spiritual core of an issue without offending anyone or being embarrassed. Remember that the majority of the art of communication is listening. People will tell you what they need . If you listen you will be able to give them that. You are all in a period where individual ministry is very important. Where a few well chosen words can change someone's life forever. There are several ways of meeting another's needs. The most important way is to show interest. Next, is to show love. And third, is to actually impart spiritual food with your words. You may only get to the first part which is interest, you may get to the second part which is showing love or loving concern, but once in a while, you will go through all three and be able to impart spiritual nourishment to one of God's children. As this week comes up, I want you to all be aware of those three steps and to try and balance out your interactions with others. If someone is not sharing enough and is being too retiring, then ask them questions and draw them out. If someone is being too talkative, too self-assertive, send them love and be patient until the time is right for a few well chosen words. But, always show interest and always show love. Also, you must pray to receive words from the Father that are suitable for his child. Every person is different and every person's needs are slightly different. You must learn to open yourselves up to the Father's guidance and let him guide what you say. If you will do this, you will begin to perceive that there are many opportunities for you to speak a well chosen word. Be joyful and interested in all of God's children and you will find that your opportunities for service multiply. Remember that you are each like an angel or a person who has seen the other side and you are brining knowledge of this greater world to those who cannot yet perceive it. What each one of you has to give is wonderful and life changing. Question: In trying to determine where we fall individually on the continuum between extroversion and introversion, can we trust our own inner sense of self on that? Do you have any guidance in this regard? Ham: You can all pretty much see yourselves clearly in this regard. Question: Can you expand on unconscious sharing? Ham: Yes, people reveal a great deal about themselves in how they interact with others, more than they mean too I would think. Humans tend to think that their hiding very well behind their shields of bravado or shyness. To the higher beings and to most other human beings these shields are transparent as glass. When humans interact, they are really unaware of how much they themselves are revealing because they are focused on figuring out the other person. I would say as a general rule people share more of themselves unconsciously than consciously, they are unaware of how much they are revealing. Question: When you said it, I was seeing that it is possible to be sharing with someone some of these higher qualities we want to exude without speaking them or otherwise indicating them Ham: Absolutely. Question: And they can pick it up, is that correct. Ham: Exactly, yes. Question: When talking about the three steps, you said the first was to show interest and the second was to show love. Could you talk about the step between showing interest and love? Ham: When you feel loving towards your fellow human being, you are accepting of what he is sharing. Love is acceptance and nonjudgment. These things allow the other to share and assure him of your receiving what he has shared. This is what builds trust and confidence and opens him up to receive what you have to share. Question: Ham, a lot of communications I have with people amount to people just talking out of control and is it totally wrong to put your hand over their mouth and bring it to their attention that they are not making sense. That happens to me a lot. Ham: Yes, you have to assert yourself more in conversation, bring yourself up more in a balanced manner rather than always listening and staying in the background. Question: It's mainly me? Ham: It's always two in any relationship, but your task is to bring yourself forward more.

# God consciousness

How the wisdom coding system works

Think of God as a personal friend

**CLASSIFICATION**
R	P	O	1

**JURISDICTION**
- [x] soil	- [x] Land	- [ ] Sea	- [ ] AIR

**SOURCE:** Rayson and Friends

Question: I am trying so hard to increase my contact with my Thought Monitor and increase my spiritual growth. The process seems so slow to me. How can I improve my worship and stillness periods? How can I be more God-reflective? How am I doing? Answer: The best way to become more God conscious is to think of our Father as a personal friend. Talk to The Father each day. Let him know of your thoughts and your feelings. It is true He does know about these things before you speak them, but it does help you. It helps you understand yourself more fully. The spirit fragment within you knows you far better than you know yourself. Do not worry about making communication. This, too, will happen when the time is right. The best way to make this happen, aside from the constant communion with The Father, is to live your life bravely, to go forth each day and be aware of who you are and your relationship with those that you come in contact with. Be sensitive to the spirits that are around you, and always be ready to feel the love from within, the God within, so that this love may flow through you fully, that it may pour forth out on those that you come in contact with, and that we may bring those people to you that you may share with them your personal religious experiences, and that you may be an instrument in helping them enter the kingdom of heaven. This is a long process, this communication with the spirit fragment. It will - for most mortal ascenders - not happen quickly. It takes much hard work and patience. Do not become burdened with the thought that I am doing what I can yet nothing happens. You will inch your way into God-consciousness. You do not run. Always be mindful of who you are. Remember that spiritual growth is an unconscious process. In time you will look back and begin to see some of the decisions that you have made and where it has led you. For now you are in the forest and you cannot yet even see the trees. This is as it should be, for now. Hopefully, with your whole-hearted dedication to doing the will of The Father, you will rise above the forest and look down and then begin to get a glimpse of where it is you have been. You will see all of the decisions that you have made and know more fully what direction to go.

You must seek friendship with God

**CLASSIFICATION**
R	P	M	1

**JURISDICTION**
- [x] soil	- [x] Land	- [ ] Sea	- [ ] AIR

**SOURCE:** tmtranscripts teamcircuits email archive November 8, 1998. Teacher Elyon T/R Jonathan

The master taught us all that, when you seek the Father, you must seek friendship with God. His absolute qualities are unfathomable; I doubt we ever will really understand Him, but we each are coming to know Him continually. We all seek recognition as associates, as pals, as friends, as teachers. There is also the human tendency towards veneration and, through this veneration, to remove from the student the sense of the ability to attain the abilities of the teacher. In your role as teacher this is my advice: that you befriend the student, that you take one another's hand and go together into the lesson. You know full well the end from the beginning. However, it is the partnership that bears upon the soul of the hungry truth seeker, it is that brotherhood that infuses one with the spirit qualities of the lesson to be gained. Association speaks louder than verbosity. So approach your teaching as a peer. This removes a sense of a gulf between the teacher and the student which the student may react to wrongly as unattainable. Bridge that gap first and they will readily cross the gap to the level that the teacher hopes to convey.

# Group dynamics

How the wisdom coding system works

The group begins when you have at least three

**CLASSIFICATION**
R	G	M	1

**JURISDICTION**
- [x] soil	- [x] Land	- [x] Sea	- [x] AIR

**SOURCE:** tmtranscripts teamcircuits email archive February 29, 2000. Teacher Tomas

The configuration of groups of people does not include a husband/wife team; that's a partnership, and even when Jesus is a part of the relationship, it is still a relationship of two mortals and that kind of relationship has its own blessings and challenges. The group begins when you have at least three, and from then on each additional person presents an aspect of change for every member of the group. The goal, again, is to be self-governing through your own maturity, through your ethics and morals established through your relationship with Our Father and socialized throughout the brotherhood of man. This is an ideal having not yet been realized sufficiently to turn the tide of your planetary government. Here I speak of another aspect of the Hundred Monkey Syndrome that has not been attained yet but it is a reasonable goal — to be self-governing and to acknowledge that your peers are also self-governing, not requiring your leadership or counsel, only insofar as your relationship is mutually dependant upon the living God that is understood, respected, revered and worshipped by all. One day this world will be settled in Light and Life and that will be the culmination, the glorious culmination of all these many thousands and thousands of years of effort on your part and on the part of your relations in the material realm — your predecessors and your progeny — animal, vegetable and mineral — attaining a way of life which gives appropriate acknowledgement and homage to Our Creator. But until the global attainment, until full stage Light and Life is here, it is fascinating to speculate, in this extremely intriguing environment, what might be effected in effort of attaining a degree of fraternity that would allow for the beginning of this potential to begin being realized and actualized. Configuration. Configuration is so important an element, to bring together those compatible sorts of personalities which will be most effective in their relationship together, even serving throughout the future eras/ages to come. Always must you remember the configuration of your members. Each occasion provides a different energy package. Each of you are becoming sufficiently astute to know and love each other in understanding of your strengths and in compassion for your weaknesses. By maintaining your spiritual roots, your ethics are able to acknowledge that in any given configuration there are strengths and weaknesses derived from the elements of the configuration. If you are in a group of people that you, in your assessment, have ascertained to have certain strengths and certain failings, you will know instinctually, intuitively and inherently whether or not the configuration of the parties are in a position to make a wise decision about a matter which would be influential in the community at large; whereas a ruling or a determination by another grouping of parties will garner a different response. To give a crass example; four women in a group will come up with a conclusion and four men in a group will come up with a conclusion and it's not necessarily so that the women's conclusion and the men's conclusion will be the same, and therefore, it would behoove you to appreciate the balance of the four women and the four men intermingled, and with the balance made more equitable, then determine the strengths and the weaknesses of the composition of the community, of the social group, of the family unit, at its largest and most effective point. This allows for greater representation, greater democracy. It allows for all your brothers and sisters to be a part of the reality of the family. Jesus is the decided head of the household insofar as he is God and has lived as man, therefore he represents, perhaps, the highest ideal. But your future world will be comprised of men and women taking their instructions from the invisible realms, not necessarily from human rulers. In the future there will be public servants in the appropriate sense, but rulership as it is understood in your government and has been known down through the ages, is a step in evolution that will evolve away. It is therefore very tricky, these times you live in, because you cannot relinquish your leaders, but they cannot be allowed to stranglehold you and your people. Even those who hold the avant garde of spiritual beliefs and values, are still subject to so much of the effects and cause and effects of your predecessors in politics and in government and in civilization, and so you are incessantly vulnerable to the might that is, even though it may not be right. As you advance into your paradigms/prototypes of civilization which afford spiritual liberty and qualities having the earmarks of high civilization, you will do well to begin to appreciate the immediate configuration, feeling and sensing the Light and Life qualities therein. As that becomes a reality for you in your intimate associations, in your small groupings, you will feel emboldened to open yourselves to the possiblilities of greater embrace, greater connection to others, and thus expanding the configuration and subsequently expanding Light and Life.

Variety in a group is very useful

**CLASSIFICATION**
R	G	C	1

**JURISDICTION**
- [x] soil	- [x] Land	- [x] Sea	- [x] AIR

**SOURCE:** tmtranscripts teamcircuits email archive January 27, 2002. Teacher Abraham

In studying the apostles it can be seen that where one was lacking, there was another to compensate. Where one was downcast, there was one to bring humor. Where one was trapped in negativity, there was always one to point out the positive. They had team-ship, their trust in one another, their common love for the Master and an unseen Father. It is beautiful to behold the non-rivalry of the siblings of Andrew and Peter. Where one brother was shy, the other was outspoken. Where one was disorganized, the other was quite capable at organization. Where one was apt to take rash actions, the other was standing firm in practicality. They had no envy for one another when one was better at something's than the other. They each truly believed that even though they were not gifted at one thing, they were glad they had a brother who was. When I think about this era of time, the Master chose certain decisions and actions because He was to set examples for the universe as a whole. He tended to the common man as well as the pride-filled man. He welcomed the educated man as well as the simple man. He incorporated the women apostles as a part of the evangelical corps as if this were not anything out of the ordinary. He, the Master, did assign some tasks here and there, but for the most part He seen with time each ones personal gift and allowed them to take that role on as their own. The women were skilled at compassion for the sick and afflicted. They were daring to go to a darker side of life to bring light. They were unafraid to be exposed for their beliefs, and the Master needed to give them very little direction, for their natural gifts took them where they were supposed to go.

Author Donna D'Ingillo has written an inspiring book detailing the untold stories of the twelve female apostles commissioned by Jesus. It is currently available on [Amazon](https://www.amazon.com/Women-Who-Loved-Jesus-Evangelistic/dp/1579830625/ref=sr_1_1?crid=1L0ZXK7Z5HATH&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.pYJw13HTIpnSS4_vVNuDD9TtFzBEs9RtiswNaEXxMYHN1x29j_FxQbONCEqjbel9dM1PFuo6egeRv4mheAPlbLBDxh2lVxU8HnIgx3oGixh56htRrp60n06LjDKPqV9-lD_FybUTzokfljGXZuXnDErZ_bLGb6a9THoglw_yqnMIGQFXsNYlcbh0rP6bgJN_VlaCKVVlhX6G8fwDbeUgNBcDHHyKnlW8WkORmb9jVNGttqujeqfpcU6Glbbs1TxQ9oo211iYywgYVuaWon69i8KcgiZDpYY3gYALq-kK2Ag.fRg3x3Df_f919o0QLU-nqdJwCtPOGxyIibvDTd8xPTc&dib_tag=se&keywords=The+women+who+loved+Jesus&qid=1730257012&sprefix=the+women+who+loved+jesus%2Caps%2C112&sr=8-1by%20Jesus.).

With the men apostles their varying social, religious, and financial status made up a great deal of the common life of that day and age. The Master needed representatives from every walk of life. The apostles had met with more challenge in dealing with one another than they did with the masses — just as you will. When you are gathered think of the Master and how He would deal with these interpersonal situations. We will meet a Judas here and there, but for the most part you can ride out your difficulties to promote each ones growth and carry on. Now we can all see Judas' mistake of going for validation and understanding to those outside of his divine beliefs. My friends, you know very well who you can speak to to find divine reality instead of ego validation. Group often harbor some bruised egos, some hurt feelings, some grandstanding, but also those that heal, those that comfort, those that accept diversity. We might also witness in groups those that seem selfish, petty and closed off, but for the most part we see poets, artists, philosophers and leaders. Without one aspect of experience you cannot become the other. Without experience of knowing prejudice, how can you become compassionate to those who are minorities? Without the experience of humiliation, how can you ever tame the ego? Without the experience of darkness, how can you ever really appreciate the light? Where there is lack and loneliness, there is light and fellowship to be found in your dedication to one another, to Michael, Mother and our First Source and Center. Be not afraid to communicate with one another. Be not afraid to consult your fellows with your life concerns. If you share not, you receive not comfort, nor suggestions for solutions. While you may have your difficulties, the comfort you receive from fellowship far outweighs these difficulties. Find time to have stillness and contemplate the Mother's presence assisting you to find those gifts you need to sharpen.

# Guardian Angels

How the wisdom coding system works

Guardians of Destiny

**CLASSIFICATION**
R	P	M	1

**JURISDICTION**
- [x] soil	- [x] Land	- [ ] Sea	- [ ] AIR

**SOURCE:** Rayson and Friends

Angels, including Guardian Angels are created spirit beings of the seraphic order, or seraphim. The [Urantia Book](https://tbg.pikapod.net/books/the-urantia-book "The Urantia Book") offers extensive details about these friendly creatures. This wisdom entry contains numerous references to terms used in the Urantia Book. A useful glossary of these terms is available from: [*The Urantia Book* GLOSSARY](https://urantiabook.org/English-Glossary-for-The-Urantia-Book)

The seraphim are the children of the Infinite and Loving Spirit. In your local universe there are many, many orders of these exquisite and friendly creatures. We are concerned with only one order in today's lesson, the Guardians of Destiny. How to explain who these wonderful beings are? Seraphim are very closely connected to the material (physical) state. Although they do not possess a material mind or body, their emotions - although spiritualized - are very, very similar to your own. They are only slightly more evolved than you. If you did not have your body you would be quite like these delightful beings. The only emotion that the seraphim cannot understand, having never been in the material state, is animal fear - which derives its roots from the physical resistance to the demise of the material body and, of course, branches out to encompass anxiety, doubt, panic, insecurities, etc. Because seraphim do not die, they cannot understand this spirit poison, which so permeates and inhibits your spiritual growth in this form. But they feel many of the same things that you do. They develop a great affection for the humans they are associated with, as well as the planet on which they serve. Some destiny guardians - or most - are experienced and have served on other planets which are not Adjuster fused for a time, until mortal death, or have served in other capacities on Earth before becoming Guardians of Destiny. This is a highly prized job for a seraphim because of the close association with the mortal ward, and because it affords the seraphim the opportunity to ascend as they shepherd their human being through this life, and Mansion Worlds, and on and even unto the Corps of the Finality. Some seraphim biunificate and become finaliters along with their mortal associates. Why does one acquire a Guardian Angel? Well, it is directly related to psychic circle advancement. As the human of normal mind becomes more spiritually evolved, you work from the outermost circle, the seventh, to the first. When a mortal is in the seventh, outermost, circle, guardian seraphim are assigned to groups of one thousand mortals along with the cherubim. Sixth circle drops to five hundred mortals per seraphim; fifth circle, one hundred mortals per seraphim; fourth is ten mortals per seraphim; and the third circle is a pivotal spiritual rung. And this is when the seraphim become personal destiny guardians. When a mortal achieves third circle status, he or she is assigned personal Guardians of Destiny - a pair of seraphim that only work with that one person. They are assigned in complementary pairs, and there is always one angel on duty every minute of your life. One angel is the recording angel, and one is the active influential angel. When one leaves for rest, the other takes over that role, and a cherubim fills in as the recorder. Humans can also receive personal destiny guardians when they are mustered into the Reserve Corps of Destiny or into the Cosmic Corps of Destiny, or when they have totally committed their will to that of the will of The Father. How does the angel help you? They are not in your mind. Unlike the Divine Monitor, they do not work from inward out, but work from outward in. They are in perfect synchronicity with your Adjuster and the Spirit of Truth. And, frankly, we do not know how the divine feat of perfection and orchestration is accomplished, as we are unaware of communication between the Adjuster and the angels. However, we speculate that communications must occur. Angels work more when the Adjuster is not communicating. You are never without the benefit of spiritual counsel in your life. What exactly, does your angel do? Well, they - as every other being from The Father on down respect the sacred nature of the human will. An angel cannot force you, manipulate you, dominate you, control you, or trick you into choice. They mostly work with the environment that surrounds you, the social moral, physical intellectual, spiritual environment in which you live day to day. They can manipulate this environment to up-step your choices. They may even, in some instances; manipulate the material-physical world, which includes your body. This is rare, but angels work closely with Midway Creatures and Master Physical Controllers. This is why, throughout the ages, God has spoken to men mainly through angels. Angels may appear. They may speak messages from Deity. They also are linked to the evolving Supreme Being. So, your guardians push you gently forward spiritually through presenting an environment which demands spiritual growth. They are matched to you in terms of like beingness and understand you much better than you understand yourself. But mistake not the work of angels for a life of pleasure and ease. Angels work best when the mortal struggle is hard and deep and painful. These are the footprints of the angels. Do not idle too long on the plateaus of past victories or your angels will be sorely tempted to push you into the troublesome waters of spiritual growth and activity. Those who are blessed with the work of angels are those individuals who experience defeat, disillusionment, disappointment, depression, obstacles, hard times, periods of doubt, isolation, loneliness, discouragement, and all of the mountainous and hard roads that constitute - in this life - the path Godward. However, this is not a bleak scene. It is the fertile soil from which your soul will spring forth renewed, alive, strengthened, more dominant, victorious, and joyous. Yes, this life is burdensome. But the fruits of your life will be seen on the Mansion Worlds and you will one day thank The Father for the opportunities, which were presented to you by your angels for your spiritual survival. When you are someday freed from the material fetters of your animal form you will sit and converse with your guardians. You will become great true, and fast friends, sentimentally linked throughout eternity. Even during the periods of separation when angels go to Seraphington, there will be constant communication, so deep is the affection between man and seraphim. Your destinies are intertwined. Your seraphim record your spiritual growth-life. When you die, the seraphim hold your memory records, soul-mind, to be reunited on the shores of Mansonia with the Divine Monitor. The seraphim stand ready and when they observe the light is gone from your being - that is, your Thought Adjuster has departed - they then report to their superiors and obtain the full roll of your spiritual blueprints which they trustfully guard until you are reawakened on the shores of Mansonia. Make no mistake of the love of your angels. They are great comforters to you. They truly empathize with your struggles and stand ever ready to applaud your victories. They - in a sense - are even more joyous for they can more fully see your victories than you yourself. They are aware of how far you must climb. They are also aware of the sublime peace, which comes from knowing The Father. The children of the Infinite Spirit are most like you. They are your spiritual best friends. They do not answer prayers: this is the job of the Creator Son, and their work continues regardless of your human pleas. But they feel along with you. This is unique to their orders of being. They feel your pain. They feel your faith. They feel your love. They feel your peace. They feel your joy. They urge you to arise when you stumble in the weeds of human frailty. They are constantly ready to lend a hand to the frail mortal. And most of all, no other creature in the universe wants you to survive or succeed more than your personal seraphic guardians. And they are ever faithful, loyal, hopeful, and diligent to aid you in the great adventure of ascension.

# Non productive relationships

How the wisdom coding system works

When to walk away from a non productive relationship

**CLASSIFICATION**
R	P	M	1

**JURISDICTION**
- [x] soil	- [x] Land	- [x] Sea	- [x] AIR

**SOURCE:** tmtranscripts teamcircuits email archive March 30, 1998. Teacher Abraham T/R Nina

Question: In our human relationships, is there a time when it is best to walk away from a non productive relationship, like throwing in the towel? Abraham: There are relationships that will not find resolution on this world. And, there is a time for detachment, there is a time for pause. If the doors are open to remain, or be detached, then your Father makes it known to you. There is "love," and then there is a "fear of loss" or "fear of separating." Your best example would be found in the life of Jesus. The Master loved his human family with all his heart. Yet, when there was demand to compromise his spiritual beliefs, the Master had to follow his Internal Compass and become detached. This doesn't mean love is lost, no. This means that there is freedom and removal of pressures that causes individuals to repeat certain patterns, to pacify the "fear of loss." The Master, being as devoted as he was to his Father in Heaven, had freedom from this "fear of loss." His deepest love lie within his very being.

Regarding our seeking of friends, four people should be recognized as our foe

**CLASSIFICATION**
E	P	M	X

**JURISDICTION**
- [x] soil	- [x] Land	- [ ] Sea	- [ ] AIR

**SOURCE:** [https://wisdomi.org/download-truth-vol-2/](https://wisdomi.org/download-truth-vol-2/) Attributed to the Buddha, but impossible to confirm.

Regarding our seeking of friends, four people should be recognized as our foe: 1. the greedy person, they fail us in four ways: - they expect much, - give little, - fear much, - and truly only pursue their own greeds (in the end). 2. the one who only agrees with you, they fail us in four ways: - they agree with our past, - they agree with our future, - and their only gift to you is empty words regarding any truth - more than this, when the occasion arises, that you might actually require some thought, from them toward your needs, they only show their unreliability. 3. the one who only flatters you, they fail us in four ways: - they approve our good deeds, - they approve our bad deeds, - and they speak favorably in front of you - but more importantly, know that they will never speak well of you behind your back. Because in order to flatter others, in your absence, they cannot speak well of you. 4. and the self-indulgent, they fail us in four ways: - they only seek our company when it involves alcohol, - late hours, - gambling, - or the pursuit of beautiful women. Remember, it is not your company they seek; rather they seek “the company of anyone.”

# The living phenomenon of friendship

How the wisdom coding system works

Friendship is where the real world – the extended world – begins

**CLASSIFICATION**
R	P	O	1

**JURISDICTION**
- [x] soil	- [x] Land	- [x] Sea	- [x] AIR

**SOURCE:** tmtranscripts Lightline Teleconference 2024-08-08

Teacher: Amanson

T/R: Mark Turnbull

[https://groups.google.com/d/msgid/tmtranscripts/8A828B3A-7A1F-4DA7-8F6D-CFC2DAFA3854%40gmail.com?utm\_medium=email&utm\_source=footer](https://groups.google.com/d/msgid/tmtranscripts/8A828B3A-7A1F-4DA7-8F6D-CFC2DAFA3854%40gmail.com?utm_medium=email&utm_source=footer)

“Friendship” is where the real world – the extended world – begins. Family is where relationships are learned – mother to child, father to child, sibling to sibling – but friendship is where that initial education is brought forth and, shall we say, unleashed on the world. And friendship, in a way, becomes the world, the world of the participants (I’m tempted to say ‘celebrants’) of the living temple that is Friendship. A friend is that mirror to us in which we see ourselves, find ourselves, groom ourselves to be worthy of further friendships, relationships that blossom into veritable beacons of light when observed from on high. Friendships are a connecting cord that, though slacking or knotting from time to time, eventually establish a single unit, a bond that, while seemingly of two (or more), is actually but one grand thing: many headed, many hearted, but still one, a separate system all its own on the planet. Thus, when friendships expand, drawing more and more members to be included under the rubric of ‘Friendship’, the world takes a step closer to its ultimate goal of all-inclusion – a family, a new family of friends. Friendship is a canvas on which the mural of mankind is painted. The aberration of war is precisely that – an aberration – for it is, perversely, fought by friends, bands of friends on either side of the fight, warring with other bands of friends who happen to find themselves on the opposing side. But both sides of the conflict are made up of friends drawn together by the bonds of friendship. And yet never thinking that their counterparts are left in the same position - struggling to make sense of a territorial misconception of friendship. If a little imagination could just be applied… So friendship is the very basis of our understanding of the world. It allows us to gauge the adhesive qualities of the life we’ve been thrown into, the path we walk, the coherence we depend on. “If you and I can be as close as this, as trusting, as devoted as I to you and you to me, then perhaps this is merely an aspect, a beautiful aspect, a grand mirroring, of a fluid and ever-dependable dynamic within and without life itself; that maybe it’s true Spring will come again next year, that rain and sun really do engender the flower, and that that same sun will continue to rise morning after morning; and that if I continue to explore (by being faithful to my friend) Friendship, that I shall discover what the phenomenon – the living phenomenon - of friendship is teaching me. Is here to teach me. And will everlastingly accompany me as I quest ever deeper outward – extending my hand – and inward – extending my faith – in the glorious search of discovery of Friendship.” Say this and mean it, live it, and all shall be well.

Friendship is what binds us together

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**SOURCE:** tmtranscripts teamcircuits email archive April 29, 2000. Teacher Anatolia, Olfana T/R Donna

Anatolia: As you go about your life, as you work in your jobs, as you live in families or other relationships, what is the singular most important aspect of living? Is it the tasks that you do each day? Or is it the joy and the comfort you find in the relationships that you have with others? Friendship is one of the most beautiful and inspiring elements of living in the universe. It is what binds us together in tolerance, in perseverance, in faith, in compassion, in forgiveness, and merciful understanding. Throughout your ascension career, others who are unlike you, those who have come from numerous planets, quite unique and different from Earth, will surround you. Yet, you will each have something in common, and that is your quest to find the Father. This is what will bind you together in relationships, in friendships, to learn from one another, to draw from one another understanding of each individual's life experience, and that unique perspective that makes you see your situation, your path to the Father, in a new and expanded light. To the extent you can on this planet, we encourage you to keep the concept of friendship foremost in your minds, for it will strengthen you and nourish you as you go about your daily tasks, humble and monotonous as they sometimes may be. It is the essence of friendship. They will add a sweet savor to your life. I bow to This Spirit Within each of you. Go in peace. Good day. Olfana: Honor these friendships you are forming among yourselves. They have consequences for you above and beyond this life. They have consequences for you that have to do with your soul growth. They have consequences for you in terms of your greater aspirations and growth. How you become a friend to others in this world "counts for something" in a much stronger way than perhaps you now realize. And I would ask you to, indeed, even look to this example of the ways in which we Teachers are now offering you a relationship, a sense of friendship, and caring kindness toward you, as a model that, indeed, matters, in how you connect among yourselves. Let us all remember that we are to be joined by God in an eternal pattern that represents so much more in majestic potentials than we now even can conceive. And in that regard, make these "holy relationships," my dear ones. Make these holy friendships, in the best possible sense. Offer this sense of holy love, and appreciation, and respect to each other, and you will find that there is, indeed, a monumental way in which this will effect the quality of your life. You are all so loved by God's Creation. You are all so dearly cared for, by so many levels of compassion, so many levels of respect and worthiness. There are Great Beings who commit themselves to your watchcare. Remember that in yourselves, my dear ones. "I am valuable enough to God that He offers His angels in my service," and in that, become a prayer toward these Beings, of love and appreciation for this watchcare. You are, indeed, the cherished ones of angels, of celestial guardians, of the Great and Mighty Most Highs, the orders of many Sons of God. You are — that — important to the universe, and in that way, I encourage you to cherish yourselves as we now cherish you, also. You may be tiny seedlings, but you are precious plants, precious blossoms, and precious creations "in potential." And we hold these seeds in the palm of our hands, and we carefully collect you, and most certainly place you in nutritious soil, as much as possible in your own growth.

# The spiritual component of relationships

How the wisdom coding system works

Relationships with those lacking spiritual development

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**SOURCE:** tmtranscripts teamcircuits email archive September 21, 1999. Teacher Malvantra, Elyon T/R Jonathan, Ginnie

Question: How we can follow our spiritual urges and at the same time deal with relationships that take a lot of time and energy. How do we keep a relationship going with someone who has not spent much time on spiritual development? Malvantra: Each situation will be its own unique set of circumstances, though these relationships take on patterns that have similarity. When the spiritual dimension in one individual is lacking or dormant, this complicates the situation. It is not insurmountable but would bring far greater work to the progress of friendship than would two people motivated on a spiritual path. This realm of spiritual perspective, of theological conception, can seem unimportant to physical creatures so largely oriented toward the external world, that certainly one could live without it if the friendship is there. But this is not the case. Imagine, for instance, having a relationship with another personality that does not have a body. This you would find difficult for that entity to be purely spiritual and mental. Would you continue a relationship of an intimate nature? Likewise, if an individual lacked mind, this would make your values shift and your goals change regarding just how you are going to pursue relationship. So, the spiritual is extremely important. I do however, express that — and I realize you well understand that the spiritual quality isn't simply intellectual understanding of religious principles but rather that personal drive toward higher ideals, toward enacting truth in your life, toward enhancing the moral, the beautiful. To decide the parameters of a relationship one must honestly ask oneself and sincerely face the feelings and the thoughts that you respond to yourself with, "Am I involved to be a minister, to guide another soul into birth in a spiritual sense? Or is this relationship that I desire one that is to be on an equal footing?" Both choices are good in themselves, but you must value the import of either one at the given time and choose appropriately. Since there are many mortals on Earth in need of spiritual ministry, you do not have to take on the task with a significant or romantic relationship. It is far more empowering in one's growth and ministry if there is mutual support, if there is, in the times of withdrawal from the activities of life, an infusion of energy, understanding, sympathy, and encouragement from one nearly equal to yourself in a spiritual sense. It is far more exhausting to be on the job, so to speak, when you are more appropriately in need of retreat. But I speak of this in regard to those intimately personal relationships of love, for this type of friendship breaks down some of those personal boundaries that everyone can retreat into for recuperation, and this relationship overlaps those boundaries. In all other relationships one need be very careful not to evaluate that another individual is not spiritually active in order to be a friend, a co-worker, a business partner. You do understand that the spiritual dimension infuses life with eternal values, higher ideals of living. But you still retain your boundaries for retreat in these other relationships. You are available to be an example, to let your fruits show, but you are not obligated to avoid a relationship because the individual is spiritually stagnant. It is this boundary of personality that I seek to impress upon you as important to guard, for it is from this center that you spring forward to be of assistance to your fellows in many ways. Few individuals are received into this inner arena. Jesus, as he lived on this world, carefully chose three apostles to share this inner circle with him, but often he spent this retreat alone in the hills with the Father. Yet he engaged with a vast array of personality types, differing inclinations, and at different rungs of the spiritual ladder. He did not avoid them because they were pagans or sinners. He sought them out. But when it was time to be in care of his own nourishment, he chose carefully who he would be with. The entire subject of relationship is as dynamic as living creatures are. An inanimate object simply is what it is from manufacture and changes only through the disruptions or erosions, accidents or conditions of time. But life-bearing creatures are continually on the move, dynamic in every sense. Put two of these dynamos together, and even more complexity arises. You have read where it says that your ideals will always outpace your ability to live up to them. Harmony in a relationship is always just beyond the ability of the participants to live up to. It is truly more a goal than it is a condition. Culture teaches that you are a better person when you attain something, some level, as in schooling, career, marriage, house, children. So, the drive continues on, generation after generation seeking these attainments, which in reality are not ends but the beginnings of even more involvement, more growth. To attain one of these goals — let's choose career as an example — one gets the job. One receives their office assignment, their desk, their materials. They have accomplished the goal of a "career". But the work has just begun. Relationships are quite similar. It is easy to meet another, to befriend, to acknowledge another, but the work has only begun in the deepening of that relationship, the infusion of greater significance in that relationship. Goals are sought-for ends. Ideals, in relation to goals, express the manner in which a goal will be reached, the method whereby you will attain this end. To have a goal in life is good, for it provides a focus in the distance wherein you may direct your path to reach, but it is the ideal that will carry you toward that goal. To be involved intimately with another individual is a good goal, but the ideals will be what drives the relationship forward. This will be ever-changing and must remain flexible, for it entails two freewill creatures. Elyon: As you progress in your ascension you begin your progress as a will creature in very basic ways. Much of relating in early primitive times was simply based on survival, material survival: eating, procreating, protection. As you grew out of these early, primitive relating states you began to see other ways of being together for other purposes. As you progress both as a culture and individually, you begin to go beyond physical survival to the survival of your soul, of your personality. That is when the spiritual element infuses you, when you begin to grasp the importance of the survival of your personality. Then you begin to see relationship as more than fighting for possession of things, more than the survival of your ego, more than greed. You go beyond those things to the things that matter for your personality survival and your personality development. It is at this point when a personality understands that there is a part of himself that needs nurturing. He or she will begin to live a life of relationship which nourishes that part of them. Indeed, it is a matter of choice. Most relationships — and I speak primarily of between man and woman — are ones of struggle to maintain the ego, and anything that goes beyond that is certainly on "spiritual" purposes. Relationship exists on all levels of your progression. Even on Paradise you will be relating; you will be dealing with how you are with other beings, what choices you make. So, you can look forward to a long, long career of relating. Unfortunately this planet is involved in putting certain kinds of relationships ahead of others as more important than the development and growth of the personality. It is then that things go wrong, because each person is seeking his or her true personality, their true identity, and it continues to be a struggle to clear away the debris of the material trappings of the world to get to a place where relationship can survive. It is certainly a blessing when two individuals feel a connection with each other. It is important to nourish that on whatever level it is but not to push it, force it, beyond what it can handle. Joy and lightness are indicative of true love, and the struggle involved is simply something that has to be dealt with so that both individuals can reach a point where their values are on a similar level. Otherwise there will be conflict, and the conflict itself will bring about more insight into your relationships. Do not disregard petty arguments as a waste of time because they have to be gotten through; they have to be dealt with to clear the air, so to speak, so that each can go beyond the uncomfortable place that they are in, as you all can recall looking back at times when you thought you were the cat's meow. Indeed, you may laugh now because you think you can see the true reality from this vantage point. So it will be many years from now you will look back and see what you are doing to yourself now that seems silly. Learn to appreciate everything, every relationship that you have whether it be friendship or relationship with you mate or your children or nature or the animals or money. Learn to appreciate all of it so that you may make better choices when it comes to deciding the quality of your relationships. Learn to bless each contact that you have, for you can learn from all of them. No relationship is wasted time. Malvantra: Oftentimes a relationship is approached because the individual seeks the fulfillment of needs. Without discounting the value of meeting needs, a relationship takes on a greater dimension when needs are no longer a part of the picture. Often a marriage relationship will break up because needs aren't being met. Other times it breaks up because all needs are met, and boredom has ensued. Being involved with another individual simply for the sake of being involved with another individual is what will bring lasting relationship. The time you spend in stillness with the Father, as extremely important as it is for your own growth, it is also very beneficial for every relationship you have, for it is in this experience of the divine that true happiness is discovered and attained such that no other thing, no other being in your life, is needed such that you will be happy when that desired result is attained. Rather, attaining an inner happiness and taking that into any relationship will bring about the joyful aspects of such deep friendships. Elyon: I have one short thing to say about intimacy, because that is what you are all seeking. You can be intimate with yourself. You can be intimate with another human. You can be intimate with the Father. You can be intimate with nature. To have a true, fulfilling relationship in development it is important that you remember all aspects of your being, that your intimacy with yourself and with God is also important before you can develop intimacy with another.

Friendship in the Kingdom of Heaven

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**SOURCE:** tmtranscripts teamcircuits email archive May 04, 2001. Teacher Cora T/R Bill

Cora: In the past, friendship has been construed as reciprocal mutual interaction. Each party in a friendship benefits from their connection with the other person and each party provides benefit to the other person. There are mutual interests and shared values; but all too often a sense of exclusiveness and possessiveness between the two friends. This view of friendship comes from animal origin, evolutionary experience, for early humans did band together primarily for protection and for the mutual benefit that such an association gave them as compared to the isolation and danger of individual survival circumstances. Let's consider friendship and membership in the Kingdom of Heaven. In this Kingdom of the brotherhood and sisterhood of God's sons and daughters we are all not only siblings, but potential friends. Our interests and values are profoundly alike, for we own common allegiance to the spiritual government of the Universe, to the very God on Paradise and to their Creator Sons and Creative Daughters. We view each intelligent being as our compatriot, as our equal, spiritually, as more kin than even the older idea of blood kinship connoted. As you learn to view other people with spiritual eyes and see past their apparent differences, viewing them as a dear brother and sister, you also are expanding the boundaries of your friendships enormously. Of course there will still be those people with whom you have more compatible personality interactions than with others, a topic you have already touched on this evening. Feel no regret when this occurs, for this will continue to be your experience, especially on the lower levels of universe progression. As you grow stronger in spiritual strength and your substance moves from primarily material weight to spiritual lightness, and the ratio of the mix changes, you will also experience a broader, greater, and deeper affectionate connection with others. Put aside completely your culturally driven need for judgment, without losing your perspective of discernment. Decide, finally, that it is not your job to judge yourself or another. You are not competent to do it, for yourself or the other individual, and therefor, it is not your job. Broaden the base of your understanding. Develop the ability to emphasize with another's life and you shall move from understanding to tolerance, and finally to loving friendship.

# Trust

How the wisdom coding system works

Learning to trust

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**SOURCE:** tmtranscripts teamcircuits email archive March 5, 1998. Teacher JamEL T/R Mark

There were a number of unusual errors with this text. The accompanying note regarding this issue states that the original digital file was started with WordPerfect 6.0 and then finished with WordPerfect 6.1. According to the transcriber, the software upgrade cause a variety of problems with the content, including the truncating of several long lines of text. We have attempted to make suitable corrections, but some parts of the text remain somewhat difficult to understand. We will attempt to find a better copy of this transcript. If you should have access to a non corrupted copy please contact us at this link: [How you can be involved](https://glow.pikapod.nethttps//tbg.pikapod.net/link/3#bkmrk-page-title/link/3#bkmrk-page-title)

I would like to speak with you tonight about yet another dysfuntion that we notice on your planet. So many of you have commented on and appreciate the beauty in nature, a sublime perfection in your appreciation for a sunset, for a rock, for a tree, for plants that you watch year after year grow and develop, varieties of the same flower that you notice in different clumpings, combinations, settings. These things you always appreciate for what they are and you appreciate them in a pure way. Never have you run across an instance where for years you have noticed a tree, in its beauty and its growth and all of its cycles, turn into a rock. On normal worlds, relationships and interactions with your brothers and sisters, can be appreciated in the same way that you appreciate nature and yet with your relationships you are never able to go in a straight connected line that you are when you appreciate nature. There is an absolute place for the appreciation of nature, it connects you to your animal self, it is an easy access to the Father and to a harmony that you do not see elsewhere in your life. But because you are missing this continuity, this straight line in the beauty of relationships you don't make the connections, or the trust, or the love-ties that draw you to exploring your relationships further. All of you are crippled in relationship exploration. It is no wonder that recently you have all been bumping up against your limitations in your relationships and how you interface with those you love, the assumptions you make about relationships. If that person only got to know the other person then we'll really see sparks fly. Dysfunction will come crawling out of their closets. And so, you are left with a lack of trust for the Father that stems from this relationship rift, a lack of connection with each other, a lack of really knowing what it is to love another, what it is to love yourself. Everybody on this planet, has missed something. There are those who have had a parental relationship that has been steady and sure and that lends so much to the future development of that person that they take quantum leaps ahead. A stability of a certain nature is good enough to get you through. There are those in your culture who have absolutely no connection with anything natural. No appreciation for natural beauty, only for sensation. Those who flock to inner cities craving sensations, addictions, stimulus, they look for that relationship pattern that perfection, in the experience. Delores: Youth? JamEL: All ages succumb to this. It is a path that some people take. Barbara: JamEl, isn't it true that the reason we mistrust what we see is because there is much to mistrust. JamEL: Oh, of course! There is a discontinuity. Your tree of a parent turned into a rock five years later. Why did that happen? How can that happen. What happened to the tree? Where did its growth go? What happened to the validity, the solid feeling/good/warm that happened in you watching the tree grow? Is all that gone now that it's a rock? Was it a lie? Do you distrust everything that you have gained from that experience that's in you? YES, you do! Barbara: Sure, but what I was getting at was that, as adults now, when we see other people, meet other people, and want to form relationships, a lot of time we see dysfuntion because that is what is being presented. JamEL: Yes. And because of your lack of development with relationships you always approach others with a certain surface interface, rather than an emotional interface. So many relationships are kept very, very superficial. It is an expectation, it's a safe way of doing business. And so the challenge you face is learning to trust. And we are not surprised that you have trouble going to the Father, a relationship that will never let you down. However, you can never seem to approach it with consistency, honesty, openness, all the things that that relationship promises to feed you back. It's not even like you distrust it. It's that you don't know what to do with it. Hughsie: Don't know how to access it. JamEl: It is alien, yes. Delores: That sense of self that JamEl had talked about which scared us off is too strange. And then there is all that fear about, OK, growing into this sane, more beautiful, perfect being. It's scary. JamEl: That more perfect being needs to relate to others. To love others, to be loved by others, to develop itself. And when you cannot have a relationship with someone else of a deep and meaningful nature, your personal development will be stunted, will be halted. And so how do you learn to trust? How do you develop this missing skill? Look at pieces and parts that you do rely on, that you look for in other people. There is something that all of you crave from your friends, that you crave from people you meet, that you spark in people you meet. What is that common bond? Because it's the thing you trust. It's the thing you look for. It is not simply, and I want to reiterate this, it is not simply the need for inappropriate emotional desires but the pattern of it, the shape of it, represents something that you trust, something that you crave and something that you feel you deserve because you continue to seek it out in everyone you meet. When it is not there you move on and you seek the next relationship: What is it about this person? There it is. And you seize on it. It's the thing that you have in common first, it's the thing that you laugh about, it's the thing that connects you and makes you feel comfortable. Look at that thing that you carry around in every relationship that you have. That's your keystone to starting the process of trusting something about the consistency of relationships. Relationships are not the chaotic morass/temporary/flowing things that you feel they are, that at any moment you could be cut-off or cut someone else off. This is unheard of on most worlds. Relationships never end. Anger happens, rifts begin and end, but relationships are eternal. Delores: This town is full of people who refuse to talk to each other because of things that happened to them in the past. JamEl: Not just this town, but yes, you're right. Delores: I'm just not going to talk to them ever, and if they see me, then I'm going this way and they're going that way. JamEl: But there is always a relationship there but it is a relationship has gone quite badly. Delores: A relationship of aversion. JamEl: It would be as if having a noxious weed in your yard, simply to ignore it, it will go away. It's always there. Hughsie: JamEl, sometimes when I meet someone new and I am interested and I want to develop a relationship with that person, often it becomes in some way they might be similar but often there are components of....they're different and I am intrigued by the difference. JamEL: Yes! That difference will have a pattern to it. That difference will have a similarity. It won't always just be your commonality with cats. It won't be something like that. It will be a flavor, a spark, a passion. An intangible something that they could attach anything to. Cars. Cats. A love of cartoons, any of that. What's behind it is what you look for. Hughsie: Sometimes that very difference is what causes the relationship not to flourish. JamEL: You distrust. Always distrusting relationships is a state of being that all of you are in. You quickly discard what does not immediately work, feel good, fit with what you are looking for. Delores: Well, a lot of times it feels good and fits and that's why I stop! JamEL: Yes. Delores: So this thing that you're talking about, is it the same for everyone? JAmEL: No, it is different for everyone. It is the one thing that you carried out of your childhood, your early relationship development that stayed consistent. Delores: It is a meta trait. Barbara: Well, it reminds me of what has been consistent in the relationships that I have had with men. In that they reminded me of my dad in one way or another where I got no validation. JamEL: But there is something beyond that dysfunction that is consistent for you. Perhaps your father wielded it with unkindness but there is a consistency there that is a key. Barbara: You mean beyond the desire for validation? JamEl: Yes. Beyond the desire for validation. You are so dysfunctional in this realm. ALL of you! That, if you were a world that never learned to walk, that you lay about - you had arms and legs and feet but you didn't know what they were for, you hooked things on them, you decorated them, you used them for pot-holders. Simply the idea, the introduction, that a big toe could be used for something else would be perplexing because you've always used it for a potholder, you've always hated the potholder so the toe itself must somehow be bad because it is associated with the potholder. There is so much to walking beyond just the big toe but that is where we start. It's the one thing that you might seize upon as a possibility. And so, I do not mean to make this a monumental focus point but it is an entry point that will lead into other things. Simply explore the consistency. Not just the consistency in dysfunction. There is a reason you look for that trait in men that reminds you of your father. There was something in your father that was consistent in his relationships that he had with other people, that he had with you. His tree always remained a tree and you look for that tree in every man you see. The tree had sour apples on it but it was a tree and it stayed that way and there is something that will always draw you back to that. Hughsie: Like the way my father treated me, I have never doubted that he loved me. JamEl: And you are lucky. And yet you find love inaccessible. Jewels: So to me with what you are saying tonight goes along with what our last one was, about our sexuality, and why do we find somebody attractive past the physical things. JamEl: Yes ! Yes! Jewels: But are they actually two different things, because to me I'm thinking they are not. JamEL: You are looking for clues, for seeds of consistency. You're looking for yourself. Part of the damage, part of your hesitation, the suppression that you put around that realm of your life, is because relationships are so absolutely foreign to you. Interfacing with some else is "sexuality", that is intimacy. That is a place where it is appropriate to be intimate and yet you crave intimacy on all these levels that you don't even know you have, and it is funnelled down to this one spot that is called sex, which is actually the entrance to so much more, yet you stop there with one big period at the end of that sentence. This is intimacy, this is the only place I can experience it, and this is all that it is, and it is bad. With all those limits surrounding you, you stand at a long hallway filled with doors. And your eyes are down and you are saying this is where I'll stand. This is where I am going to experience this and I'm not looking around! And I feel guilty for even standing here. You are complex twisted things. We love you dearly and we are always looking for little edges to peel up, hoping that they will become a hang-nail that will always annoy you and you will continue to look back at that spot and wonder what is under there. You are so turned around. You find yourself standing in spots that you feel so explored and yet, it's just the beginning. Other places you are so underdeveloped we wonder how you will ever make it. But you are so tenacious and the nature of your twists form other twists that form other twists that often lead you back to where you need to be. As long as you can keep your faith, your connection with the universe, your hope. As long as you can hold on to the promise that the universe has given you that you will be fulfiled in every way no matter how far down the road you have slid, no matter how twisted you have become, no matter how mired, obsessive, compulsive, you have become that you will make it. Simply by your wanting. A tiny, tiny, tiny fraction of wanting is all it needs for all those mires and twists to start to unravel. It doesn't take much. You expect much of yourselves and we applaud every enormous step that you take. Jewels: So, I don't understand how I can have this one relationship with X and there is a certain amount of trust and there is a certain amount of this intimacy thing, and I didn't ask for it, I mean it just kind of happened. And yet, I know, with my own group members it's like a struggle, to learn to get to that point. JamEL Yes. Yes. Jewels: I don't get it. Barbara: Don't you think sometimes when you say that is what you are going to do, it makes it harder? Jewels: I always thought like X and I were kindred spirits. I mean, I thought I knew what that word kindred meant, but now I don't. JamEL: There is something that each of you have, each of you, not just you, not just her, that is complimentary. That is a trusting spot. Not just trust but something that you recognize in her that is consistent in your life. She is a person you can rely on and trust because you know a piece of her that is in yourself. You recognize a wholeness in a part of her. Jewels: And so it is a matter of finding that wholeness in other people, or finding that connection. That's what you are talking about? JamEl: Yes. yes. It's your entry point. It's your stepping stone. It's YOUR stepping stone. There is a hunk of you that is intact. Delores: In everyone? JamEL: Yes, everyone. You all have friendships that you enjoy. You have friendships that baffle you. You wonder why you like this person more than that, or why you feel more comfortable around this person over that person when you should be closer to this person than that person, all the convolutions that you go through wondering if you're just avoiding intimacy or why is this person..... all the things you go through. There is a chunk of yourself that you recognize and that reflects in the other. Jewels: Like being mirrored back...and that's how we find ourselves. JAmEL: Yes, and it is the single piece of your early relationship development that remained intact. For some of you it's a small piece, a small island, but there was something that remained intact. On a normal planet you would have, just as crawling, talking, learning ego boundaries, you would have relationship development skills. You would have whole relationships with your parents. You would have whole relationships with childhood friends that would become adult friends. There would be no such thing as a friend that got left behind. "You'll make new friends." We cringe when we hear parents say this. It is a comfort and a solace and a grim truth that happens on this planet and it's appropriate for them to say but "You'll make new friends" meaning the old friends will just go away, that those relationships evaporate because you are no longer present, that dissolves a piece of that relationship development stage. Barbara: So how do we learn how to recognize the congruent parts between us and the others around us and how to keep from falling into codependency trap. JamEL: No. Recognize the piece first. We'll deal with the codependency later. There are so may parts to this. Delores: But looking back on all our other relationships, we can see why certain people attracted us. There might be clues there. Parts of our hearts that we have lost and people that we have lost and what those connections were. JamEL: Yes. Just wandering through your memory and thinking of all the people that you ran across, the postmaster, the person at the grocery store that you saw for fifteen years in a row. There was always something there that you enjoyed, you smiled, you walked away. You didn't criticize or judge them, you just enjoyed the interaction. If you collect enough of those pieces in everyone, you'll start to see yourself. You'll start to define that part. And the codependency is, unfortunately, a natural part of that, you've got a tiny piece and you want to hold onto it so badly that you'd do anything to make that piece bigger, to make that connection stronger. Barbara: See, I can tell how much I distrust what you are saying just by sitting here and I've got my arms crossed and my legs crossed and I am saying to myself, I'm not sure I like this. But I see your point. I mean there has to be something in there that is still valid. Or what would be the sense of keeping us on here? JamEl: Yes. And you still talk to each other, so you are not isolated. But there is a place where you would look at a relationship that two people have and go. That is beautiful. That is spectacular. Look at the dynamic between them. Look at how when they come together they create this, consistently. Look how it evolves. There are older beings that younger beings will follow around just to admire their relationship. They will want to be part of that persons relationship-pattern. Just as you will drive to a museum to admire artwork, relationships will become this for you. You will enjoy relationships and compliment with so many different people and it will go beyond just the pairing that you look for now, the mirroring. You will look for the subtle differences, the nuance, shade, the compliment. Delores: When? JamEl: Much time from now. Right now, look for a nice mirror. Find your reflection and love it. Jewels: That's really interesting because if I can learn to enjoy that moment, that is there with X, and realize that that's me too, not just her! Then that is going to allow me to love that part of myself. JamEl: It's not just her that is wonderful. It's you and her together that makes you wonderful. Delores: Reminds me of those two Hindu ladies in my yoga class who have begun talking to me and as they talk their faces get all lighted up and they look all like kids and I can tell my eyes are getting bigger and my face is face is changing all, and we're doing this wild animate talking and we are all falling in love with each other together but it's still safe because we are not really getting into...you know...I always run away! JamEl: Oh, but you are giving...you are finding that piece. There is something in that. That is the mirror. Delores: That's what you are talking about then? JamEL: Yes. Without thought, without judgement. This person may be uneducated, you may be disgusted with them in almost every other thing but there is that piece that makes you smile. You don't think about it. You just enjoy them. You enjoy the moment you are swept up into it. Perhaps if you made time to spend together it would be awful, you wouldn't have anything to talk about, because you would be pressing past that piece. And it is with those that you chose to be intimate with that you can start to discover pieces you have in common that are not so connected. Trying to make a larger island out of your chunk of relationship development. Delores: It takes a longer time to do it with seven people. JamEl: Intimacy. Intimacy is a relationship trust-builder. Intimacy is in itself a relationship component, it is not the whole relationship. Self and difference. But self and difference needs self first. You can't experience difference, in a way, until you have self. Barbara: You are talking about personality pattern. JamEl: Yes. You can't have green next to your red until you've surrounded your red with every shade of red. Unfortunately, you are not children. You are adults on this planet and there is a force and a compromise and a pressure that you need to make with your relationships that is not comfortable but with work it starts to piece together. Relationships are hard work and they are harder work on this planet. Barbara: Yes, because what you, what all of you teachers have said all along about this group, is more than just the mirroring and the recognition that you're talking about with the wider world. JamEL: And so, stepping away from the adult issues of the more than mirroring, come back to the simpler and try to make your mirrors bigger. That will grow that development, that child that needed to know that those relationships remained consistent. Find the consistency in yourself. Grow it. Enjoy it. Realize that it is you, a piece of you that is making that magic happen. Barbara: Well. I can see where it would cut heavily into judgmentalism, too. JamEl: Yes, as you were discussing earlier, even the most, the ugliest things, can be beautiful when there is a relationship there. Jewels: When we have...where we have agitation, we meet somebody and there is some agitation, could there be, other than the triggers there could be that other thing to where that's what we have too, we're agitated against them, but itss that little ugly part of us, or of ourselves? JamEl: Yes. There are consistent relationship parts that are not so wonderful. Triggers as you call them. Pieces that you each carry that set each other off, or just one side can carry it. Barbara: I suppose it would be worthwhile to look at those too. JamEl: Those are the ones you focus on more often. Less often you focus on the ones that are beautiful and are yourselves. Looking at what's wrong is a form of protection sometimes, if taken too far. You do not spend enough time looking at what's right. Barbara: It reminds me of hyper-vigilance, you know, you are always guarded. JamEL: Yes, always seeking another reason to build walls. Look for reasons to open your hearts. Jewels: So in those situations, it could be a good thing at times just to walk away from it. JamEl: Yes. Especially if it is sacrificing the piece, the confidence, the self, that you have been developing. This is not simple. There is no one answer or another. But, always, love yourselves. Always make room for that. Love yourself. You all get so wound up, so hopped up, so shut down and you start looking for goals and rewards as excuses for loving yourselves that it could't possibly be as easy as free! There is a price attached to everything, is there not? So, until you can do the handstand, you will not be lovable. And then, after you do the handstand, perhaps not until you do the dishes will you be lovable. Ah, but then, since that was so attainable, it must not that worthwhile and therefore YOU are not that worthwhile and so the love you gave yourself was...cheap. And you have to work harder at it. Delores: Yes, we invalidate it. JamEL: All these games keep you away from yourself, do you no favors. You do not have to be a hard working grown-up to love yourself. It is something you can give yourself for free. Delores: The best things in life are free, they say! JamEL: Those people mostly knew what they were talking about. Jewels: Is there a part of ourselves where we choose what we are going to put in that spot? JamEL: Always. You are just looking for the fragmented path that you were supposed to have to be able to walk back and forth on. You pick up brick and you find a piece and you pick up another piece of brick and you find another piece and if you could just step back far enough you can almost see which direction it went in. But those are your bricks to lay. Once you decide where to stand and a few stepping stones to get you across the muddy spots, you can start to make your own road, your own path. We are just helping you uncover the foundation that you don't believe you have. And to some degree you don't but there are some pieces there and they are good pieces, substantial pieces, but pieces you don't understand. They are mostly covered up with dirt. You don't know how big they are, how far it goes down, how hard you should work to dig them up, what bush to look under next. Delores: How much broken glass is in the way. JamEl: Yes! Yes. Barbara: But it is all choice-making, really, once we've gotten to a certain place. jamEl: You just are lost. and you don't deserve to be. Hughsey: Oh...we're just in between places we recognize. JamEl: Yes! In the truest sense you are, yes. JamEL: Remember the Father loves you, even though you may not know what that means. And that you are not held to blame, not held responsible for the fact that you don't know what to do with that yet. The love is still there. In the three seconds a day that you realize it, it is enough. And when you see a wonderful sunset, when you enjoy a friend, that's a connection to the Father, that you can have, that is yours, that is substantial.

# What is friendship?

How the wisdom coding system works

Friendship is the highest human relationship

**CLASSIFICATION**
R	P	M	1

**JURISDICTION**
- [x] soil	- [x] Land	- [ ] Sea	- [ ] AIR

**SOURCE:** Rayson and Friends

What is friendship? Friendship is perhaps the highest human relationship that can exist on Earth. It is the desire to serve one's fellow human and that human's desire to serve you. Service is not duty: it is loving kindness. It involves no obligation. It involves no “shoulds.” It involves no “have tos.” It comes from love, the love of one human for another, to put their good first. It has no price tag, true friendship. It is freely given and gratefully received as the great gift of time. It comes from understanding. When you feel annoyance, irritation, hurt, conflict you must spiritually stop and reflect and pray to understand that person, for when you understand, tolerance begins. Tolerance is a fruit of the spirit. Now, once tolerance, real tolerance, not false tolerance, exists in the human, then love grows. It is the door to love. Now, some personalities are easily understood, intuitively. Others require more work. Theoretically every personality has the capacity to love every other, but in actuality that remains not so or potential far into your ascendent career. But we may begin consciously practicing friendship right now. Do not underestimate this word. It is what kept the Apostles together; not faith, not teachings, not association with the Creator Son in human form, it was simple and glorious friendship! Friendship, the cement of loyalty, being sure of love, the bind which cannot be broken. Friendship can exist not only amongst your species, but you may also be friends with your angels, with myself and the other teachers, and with God. Think of God as a friendship and do not neglect your service to Him. Many may say we are respectful toward others because they contain a piece of The Father. That is true, but it has not deep roots in the human heart. You do not yet believe you contain this piece in yourself; how then could you believe it in another - truly believe it and act on it? Thus, we must approach spiritual living from a different standpoint the standpoint of tolerance, friendship, love. Every partnership throughout your ascension career will be based upon these qualities. Indeed, when you reach Mansonia, your companions will be - of course - your guardian seraphim, but when you are not with them, your closest companions will be the transition seraphim, who are visiting or unassigned seraphim of friendship. They will teach you much. They want to be your friends. This word is overused by you, and thus undervalued. You will read [Rodan](https://tbg.pikapod.net/books/the-urantia-book/page/160-rodan-of-alexandria "160. Rodan of Alexandria") and practice being a better friend with one person. You may choose to share this amongst yourselves or keep it private. That is up to each of you. But this will be your assignment. We shall practice, and I know - my brothers and sisters - next week you will come with even more radiant hearts and souls and smiles to this meeting. Friendship is the basis for your entire ascension career, the outreach to serve one's fellows, the understanding followers, the honoring of their Divinity and evolving souls, and the eventual love that will grow. Partnership with other ascendant beings and all other universe beings is the essential nature of service. To know ones fellows, to rise above personality conflict, to love those who are still different, eventually, is intense spiritual growth. We start simply because a quart cannot exceed a pint and you are little pints right now.

There are four people who should be regarded as friends

**CLASSIFICATION**
E	P	M	X

**JURISDICTION**
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**SOURCE:** [https://wisdomi.org/download-truth-vol-2/](https://wisdomi.org/download-truth-vol-2/)Attributed to the Buddha, but impossible to confirm.

Now, there are four people who should be regarded as friends. They are: 1. The helper, is our friend in four ways: - they protect you when unforeseen dangers strike, - they protect your property when you are away or unable to do so yourself, - they will show their strength when you are in fear, - and when you have work to be done, they supply twice as much help as you require. 2. Those who never change in good times or bad, are our friend in four ways: - they tell you their secrets, - they do not reveal your secrets, - they will never leave you in times of trouble, - and most importantly, they will lay down their life for those they love. *John 15:12 This is my commandment, That ye love one another, as I have loved you.* *John 15:13 Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.* 3. Those who only give good advice, they are our friends in four ways: - they keep you from doing wrong, - they assist you when you do what is right, - they freely teach what you do not know, - and most importantly, they show you the way to heaven. 4. And those who are compassionate, they are our friend in four ways: - they do not find enjoyment through your misery, - they find happiness in your good times, - they will restrain any who speak poorly of you, - and will rejoice when others speak well of you.

When your friend comes to visit, your day is elevated

**CLASSIFICATION**
R	P	M	1

**JURISDICTION**
- [x] soil	- [x] Land	- [ ] Sea	- [ ] AIR

**SOURCE:** tmtranscripts teamcircuits email archive May 05, 2001. Teacher Tomas T/R Gerdean

Tomas: In the sweep of time and space there is sometimes no particular reason to come together in association except for the merits of relationship, the amicability of a friendly visit. The quality of an informal get-together is an event even so. It is an opportunity for you to review your wealth of accomplishments and associations. When your friend comes to visit, your day is elevated from a day of solitude into a sharing situation that helps you realize the interweaving of personalities throughout the lives of those who find value in fellowship. "The road to a friend's house is never long," it is said. All it requires is a decision to make the effort to step out of isolation into companionship. We are coming into the season where your lives will be enriched by associations with fellows offering opportunity now to enhance your well-being by engaging in exchanges of philosophy and creativity, such that you are able to augment the quality of your life and the lives of others by the texture of two where there was one. The quality of relationship is a means to another dimension. You are in a position to put into practice the belief that if there are two or more of you gathered together in His name, He is there in your midst, and so you have an opportunity to enhance a simple Saturday visit by inviting a reflection of the Spirit of Truth to join with you. Enhancing your fellowship by the presence of the Master, you grant yourselves liberation from the fetters of time and the monotony of mortal existence, thus your chance visit by a friend passing by is a rightful celebration, an event, an alteration in time and space. I was reflecting on the impression of how so many find their lives a dark backdrop upon which occasional events evince a bright light on their otherwise grey existence, but how it seems that as you incorporate your divine nature in your appreciation of who you are, you are more able to discern your life as an experience of enlightenment and increasing luminosity with occasional shadow valleys of experiential musings. Let's add some color to this palette by inviting in a friend, by opening the door of your mind, heart, soul and psyche to the interconnectedness that comes when you reach out to others and they reach out to you. It has been said that `He who would have friends must show himself friendly.' Oh, I could have a whole lesson on how that may be perceived, but you who have been born of the spirit have certainly perceived the light of truth in the friendly nature of one who has goodwill toward all men, one who has agendas but which do not require full time devotion, ones who stop by on a Saturday afternoon to conjoin in the interests of others without guile. Friendliness is a skill, an art. After having been exposed to the darkness, there may be some reluctance to open yourself to the light of friendship. It may require from you an effort. It may require from you a certain commitment to step out of the sanctity of solitude into the adventurous arena of association. All this to say how much I enjoy the pleasure of your company! I look forward to our visits. I have been exposed to circumstances which are far more backward, wherein tribal members regard an outsider with distrust, and although I have no worries that we'll be burned at the stake, I am aware of occasions when the visitor receives "the evil eye" even in advance of their arrival. This is the beginning of a new era. Only the beginning, but we have definitely stepped over the threshold. We begin anew in some very fundamental areas. It's necessary, — in order for us to build, create, design, develop, foster, further new levels of relationship, interaction, business and community, — to extend our hand in friendship. In this way our limited solitary existence is expanded to include the spouse, the family, the clan, the tribe, the nation, the globe, the galaxy. When you reach a point of stepping out into an area of investigation and you encounter those who are closed or suspicious, doubtful, distrusting, think of them in terms of those who have not yet seen the light. They have not come out from their long solitude into the clearing — where the light of the Son shines — but such a startling example can you set, those of you who have nothing to fear by opening your hearts and minds to impressions of others as they enter into your frame of reference as a gift, a bestowal, a breath of fresh air, a creative stimuli that elevates a common everyday day in the life to a personal spiritual experience because it has been enhanced by a simple visit from a common friend. It does take time to develop meaningful associations, the kind that amount to kindred spirits in will, but these relationships are developed out of mere associations, by and through your extending yourself in friendship into the arena of life without judgment, without pressure, without prejudice but with a childlike attitude of a party-goer, invited to celebrate a birthday with a neighboring child and friends.

Friendship is a state - relationship is a process

**CLASSIFICATION**
R	P	M	1

**JURISDICTION**
- [x] soil	- [x] Land	- [ ] Sea	- [ ] AIR

**SOURCE:** tmtranscripts teamcircuits email archive April 14, 2002. Teacher Elyon T/R Jonathan

Elyon: The golden rule is so relating yourself to another that they gain the greatest possible good, that your relationship with another becomes the opportunity for the realization of the reality of God for that other individual, not in a theoretical acknowledgment of God's factuality, but rather in the intimate dynamism, that energy flow of the presence of God through one of His children to another of His children. Friendship is a factor in relationship, however, there need not be relationship in order for friendship to be long-standing. Many of you know this from friends of years' past, those whom you still hold dear yet you have no daily interchange that fosters relationship. Therefore friendship is a state; relationship is a process. In order to further friendship, that is, to uplift its state, you must develop the skills or at least the sensitivity towards those skills that foster interrelated friendship, that being relationship. The Father has undertaken an immense plan, and that is the bestowal of as many personalities as are resident in potential in His being that can be manifest individually apart from Him, and then to draw these very personalities back into unity with His being, not a return to the state of oneness, but to ascend to that Supreme level of relationship, interconnected unity of diverse personalities. This is a transcendent oneness, a togetherness. This being His desire, you are faced daily with this dynamic of relationship. No one does well in isolation, and you will find in your life little opportunity to be isolated, for all that makes up your daily activities requires some form of exchange with another individual. It is inescapable. Of course I might add this does increase the importance of stillness, time alone. However, it is aloneness with the Father, again, another interpersonal moment. It is often taught that friendliness is good manners, and manners are confused with friendship. Friendliness is not friendship. Friendship grows from understanding and love. Friendliness is actions that maintain interchange person to person. One can be friendly and have no friends. One can have many friends and fail at being friendly. One is an internal state of being and the other is merely a code of behavior. Relationships, it has been said, are an end in themselves, and what is that end but friendship? There can be no superficiality of relationship. The very word itself demands interrelated, interdependent connectivity. It is not had through formality of behavior, and it survives improper behavior, for love will penetrate all mistakes and reach to the core of the being to whom the relationship is invested. The keys, the tools, for relationships are found in the citing of that which is the fruit of the spirit: forgiveness and tolerance, mercy and patience, kindness, deep and sincere interest in another being, and curiosity about the makeup of another personality. We are all at times baffled by our own personality makeup. It is difficult to discern how well you tick, perhaps more difficult than it is to discover how another operates, for every layer you uncover in yourself reveals a deeper layer. It is unending, for the penetration of the understanding of self leads to the discovery of the great Personality of Paradise. That task is endless. You are limited in the understanding of another, and therefore your attempt to understand reaches an end, for it is impossible to take the inner journey of another individual. In order to benefit from the uniqueness of another bestowal of God in the form of another creature of free will you must enter into relationship. It is not had through a probing, searching, of another. It is had through enticing the bequeathment of the inner state of that individual to you. That is done best through your own willingness to lay before another your being, your wishes, your ideals, longings, and goals. You know that the Master gained understanding of others through questions. That was the enticement for the other to share. He did not run down a checklist to make sure they filled in the proper blanks before he sought their friendship. He sought their friendship without knowing them, and in their revealing of themselves they became his friend and he became theirs. You know of the phrase of taking the mote out of your own eye before you take the speck out of another. I refer to this line to illustrate my comments of how much more deep and unfathomable your own personality makeup is to you, or perhaps more correctly, how much more access to the depths of personality you have of yourself than you do another. By sharing the depths of yourself that you have discovered you allow another to receive the benefits of that interpersonal relationship and give the opportunity for another to be so related to that they come to a deeper understanding of themselves. The deeper your connection with the Father's presence the better friendship, relationship, and ministry you will have with another, the more you will be able to relate yourself to another as God would relate to them. What is God's primary goal but the revelation of His being to His children? He does not demand that you reveal yourself to Him. He seeks to reveal Himself to you. In your discovery of that revelation you are inspired to reveal yourself to Him and to others. I would once again to return to the line of the mote and the sliver. Rather than look at it in terms of one's faults and another's faults, to look at it as the potential of discovery by placing your mote, that beam in yourself, before another to witness. If we define that beam, that mote in this case, to be the depths of your personality potential and actuals, another may discover that they do have but a speck, but a sliver, of discovered potential within themselves. That little speck can enlarge into their own beam of self awareness, of Father consciousness, and of universe citizenship.